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That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this computer could be fooled. He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the computer, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00.

The machine again made the usual noises, flashed lights, and printed out the following analysis: Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant.......twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And...if you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.

The boy then went to his sister and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars? The girl replied, Oh my God, I would just love to do that. I would be nuts to pass up that opportunity." The boy pondered that for a few days, then went back to his dad. His father asked him, "Did you find out the difference between potential and realistic?" The boy replied, "Yes, sir. Potentially, we're sitting on two million dollars, but realistically, we're living with two sluts!"

That night, on a meal of lightly sauteed frogs legs seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled to herself and thought: I don't fucking think so.